Common Store.

Book clips on random thoughts,religion’s way out

Book Title:The Brothers Karamazov By Fyodor Dostoevsky

Have you ever had such experience as when you want to live by some religion or belief but easily find something about that religion is not true,for example you would love to believe in God and his theory yet find it wrong for the sun is not the centre of the universe?And eventually you lost your faith,then you switch to another belief and the same thing happen?

I’ve always had that feeling,I’ve been hating myself for coming up with those obvious fact that goes against the belief,ended up giving in to believing nothing at all but regard each of them as an Opinion.

That’s why I found this clip worthwile,it solves the problem.

“What makes you suffer so?”

“I suffer from my lack of faith…”

“Oh no,no!I wouldn’t even dare think of that…But life after death–it is such a puzzle and no one,no one at all,has the answer!Please listen to me,you who can heal,you who know the human soul so well;of course I don’t dare to presume that you will believe everything I say,but I give you my solemn word that I am not talking lightly now,and that the thought of life beyond the grave worries,terrifies,and torments me.And I don’t know to whom to turn.I’ve never dared to speak of it before..And now I’ve told you…Oh,my God,what will you think of me now!”

And she threw up her hands in despair.

“Don’t worry about my opinion of you,”the elder said.”I entirely believe in the sincerity of your anguish.”

“Oh,thank you,thank you!You see,I close my eyes and I reason this:People do have faith,but where does it come from?I’ve heard it said that it all came originally from fear of menacing natural phenomena,and that there’s nothing else to it.So I say to myself:’What if,after I’ve been a believer all my life,when I die it suddenly turns out that after life there’s nothing at all,nothing but wild grass growing on my grave,’as some writer put it.That’s terrible!And how can I regain my faith?I mush say,I only really believed when I was a little girl.I took things for granted then,without questioning.What is there to prove it to me now?This is what I have come here for,to throw myself at your feet and ask you.Why,if I miss this opportunity,I will never find the answer in all my life.So how can I prove it to myself,how can I become convinced?Oh,I am so unhappy!When I look around me,I realize that people don’t care,hardly anyone does,and I’m the only one who cannot bear it.It is dreadful,just dreadful!”

“I am sure it is dreadful,but nothing can be proved,although one can become convinced.”

“How?By what?”

“By acts of love.Try to love your neighbours,love them actively and unceasingly.And as you learn to love them more and more,you will be more and more convinced of the existence of God and of the immortality of your soul.And if you achieve complete self-abnegation in your love for your fellow man,you will certainly gain faith,and there will be no room in your soul for any doubt whatsoever.This has been tested.This is the true way.”

“Acts of love?That’s another problem,and what a problem!You see,I love mankind so much that,believe it or not,there are moments when I would like to give up everything,abandon my daughter,and become a hospital nurse.I close my eyes and let my imagination wander,and during those minutes I feel an irresistible strength within me.No wounds,no infected sores,however terrible,could frighten me away then.I would clean them with my own hands.I would look after those sufferers.I would be ready to kiss their sores…”

“It is good that you should think of these things rather than others…But it would be very nice if you actually performed some good deed.”

“Yes,but how long do you think I could live such a life?”Mrs.Khokhlakov said heatedly,an almost hysterical note creeping into her voice.”That’s the crucial point!Yes,that’s the question that torments me most.I close my eyes and I ask myself:’How long do you think you could endure that life?What if a patient,whose sores you were cleaning,instead of being grateful to you,tormented you with his whims and had no appreciation whatsoever for your services to mankind,talked rudely to you,or even complained about you to your superiors,as people who are in pain so often so?What would happen then?Would you go on loving him or not?’And I must tell you that,to my own dismay,I have come to this conclusion:if anything could dampen my’active love’for mankind,it is ingratitude.In other words,I’m willing to work if I am paid for it.But I want to be paid at once.I mean I want to be praised and paid for love with love.Otherwise,I am quite incapbale of loving anyone.”

She seemed to be in a paroxysm of sincere self-deprecation and,as she finished,there was a challenge to the elder in her eyes.

“That’s exactly what a doctor told me quite some time ago,”the elder remarked.”He was not a young man and he was certainly intelligent.He was just as sincere as you are,although he spoke in an anmused tone,with a sort of bitter humour.’I love mankind,’he said,’but I find to my amazement that the more I love mankind as a whole,the less I love individual people.In my thoughts,’the doctor told me,’I often visualize ecstatically the sacrifices I could make for mankind and,indeed,I might even accept martyrdom for my fellow men if circumstances suddenly demanded it for me.In actual fact,however,I cannot bear to spend two days in the same room with another person.And this I know from personal experience.Whenever someone is too close to me,I feel my personal dignity and freedom are being infringed upon.Within twenty-four hours I can come to hate the best of men,perhaps because he eats too slowly or because he has a cold and keeps blowing his nose.I become a man’s enemy,’he said,’as soon as he touches me.But to make up for it,the more I hate individual people,the more ardent is my general love for mankind.'”

“But what’s the answer then?What’s to be done in such a case?Is it completely hopeless?”

“No,because the very fact that it worries you is enough in itself.Do the best you can and it will stand you in good stead.As it is,you have done a great deal,for you have spoken to me so frankly only to make me praise you for your sincerity,then,of course,you will fail to accomplish true acts of love;all your good intentions will remain mere daydreams,and your whole life will slip by like a shadow.In that case,you will certainly forget all about the futurelife as well,and in the end you will somehow or other stop worrying altogether.”

“I feel completely crushed!This very second I realize that,as you say,I was expecting you to praise me for my sincerity when I told you that I would not be able to bear ingratitude.You have brought out what is within me.You saw it and you have shown it to me!”

“Do you really mean what you say now?If so,after what you have admitted,I am sure that you are sincere and that you have a good heart.Even if it is not given to you to achieve happiness,you must always remember that you are on the right path and you must try not to stray from it.Above all,avoid lying,especially lying to yourself.Keep watching out for your lies,watch for them every hour ,every minute .Also avoid disgust,both for others and for yourself. whatever strikes you as disgusting within yourself is cleansed by the mere fact that you notice it.Avoid fear too, although fear is really only a consequence of lies.Never be afraid of your petty selfishness when you try to achieve love ,and don’t be too alarmed if you act badly on occasion.I’m sorry I cannot tell you anything more reassuring.A true act of love,unlike imaginary love,is hard and forbidding.Imaginary love yearns for an immediate heroic act that is achieved quickly and seen by everyone.People may actualy reach a point where they are willing to sacrifice their lives,as long as the ordeal doesn’t last too long,is quickly over–just like ont the stage,with the public watching and admiring.A true act of love,on the other hand,requires hard work and patience,and,for some,it is a whole way of life.But I predict that at the very moment when you see despairingly that,despite all your efforts,you have not only failed to come closer to your goal but,indeed,seem even farther from it than ever–recognize the miraculous power of our Lord,who has always loved you and has secretly guided you all along…”

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